Bowling for Enchiladas

My poor baby passed out at a Mexican restaurant, which means I had to eat while cradling her. I may have dropped enchilada on her face. Twice. And then licked it off.

Tastes Like Chicken

I did one of those Facebook things where you copy and paste a list of questions to your status. This particular list was about my mom. One answer spawned an interesting subthread.

Sweet Titty Relief

A dear friend recently had a breast biopsy (everything turned out fine!) and was lamenting the fact that she had to wear a bra for 72 hours straight. Someone convinced her to buy a nursing bra so it would be easier to fit her ice packs in it.

Put Your Ass into It

A friend of mine bought me a vegetable chopper.

I forwarded the above exchange to the aforementioned Tara, which resulted in this conversation:

The song, in case you're curious.

Getting Crazy with the Cheese (Whiz)

Echo (echo echo echo)

A lot of things in our house are automated, and voice responsive via our Amazon Echo (who answers to the name Alexa). 

Hubs: Hey, go turn the alarm on.
Me: You know you could ask your bitch to do that.
Hubs: I just did.

Gray Hair, Don't Care

Background: Hubs is bald.

Love Language

We're discussing a funny habit Hubs has that is a longstanding joke in his family.

Me: I understand why you do it, but I'm going to continue making fun of you for it.
Hubs: I know. It's okay. I make fun of you for lots of things too and I don't intend to stop.
Me: I know.
Hubs: Speaking of which, have you seen your face today?

Second Time Around

We've gone out for ice cream at a new place, Hubs orders his standard chocolate, and eats it all. I dip my spoon in the tiny puddle that's left so I can taste it.

Me: I guess the chocolate was good, huh?
Hubs: Oh. Sorry. I didn't give you a bite.
Me: That's okay, I just wanted to taste it.
Hubs: [leans in] Okay, baby bird. Open up.

Another Dimension

We're talking about the phenomenal things that can be done with 3D printing, including the creation of body parts.

My mom: Eventually we'll be able to live forever. We'll just keep printing out replacement parts.
Hubs: Ooh. I'm gonna do that. I'll be here forever.
Me: Oh, god no. You have to die at some point so I can enjoy some time without you.