We got together with my parents today to belatedly celebrate my birthday. Hubs already bought me some exercise DVDs (at my request, not because he has a death wish). My mom bought me a new swimsuit that bore this tag:
Me: Um... Okay.
My mom: I swear I did not see that until after I bought it.
My dad: You could wear two of them and look twenty pounds lighter!
Me: So Hubs bought me workout videos and you got me a slimming swimsuit...
My dad: [handing me another gift] And here's your subscription to NutriSystem!
(For the record, I'm not fat and none of the comments were malicious. I don't want anyone thinking my family is comprised of actual assholes.)
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