Saturday, May 19, 2018

Amazing is as Amazing Does

Me: I'm hungry. And thirsty.
Hubs: Anything else?
Hubs: I was looking for things that are true.

Mere seconds later he pisses me off, then turns away to look out the car window. As soon as he turns back I smack him.

Me: I waited til you turned around because I wanted you to see it coming.
Hubs: [mouth agape] That was kind of amazing.
Me: I told you.

Friday, May 11, 2018

Jiminy Cricket

I've been invited to a bachelorette party that will involve strippers, which is a first for me. 

Tuesday, April 24, 2018

There Can Only Be One

I just got a new vehicle that is roughly seventeen times the size of my last one. I can't park it. My five-year-old was not impressed with my five attempts at hitting a spot the other day.

Wednesday, April 18, 2018