I've been watching Hubs painstakingly apply marinara to three small pizza crusts for our dinner, making sure they're perfectly covered.
Hubs: Is this the sauce you want?
Me: Yeah, but I'll put it on afterwards. I'm using my cauliflower crust.
Hubs: Why you gotta be so weird?
Me: Why you gotta spend 45 minutes putting sauce on pizza?
Hubs: Have you seen me butter rolls?
Me: I have lost so much time because of your OCD. I can't even imagine how much you've lost. Do you know how much time you could save if you just half-assed things?
Hubs: That sounds like a book.
Me: Yes! Save Time by Half-Assing Things. Like, who needs two coats of paint? Just do one and tell people it's a thing. Start a trend.
Hubs: Turn on fewer lights and no one will notice the difference.
Me: See? Save time, plus money on paint, plus money on electricity! I'm onto something here.
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